D.S.C. wins again!!!

As we set off the conditions seemed too tough for the event, with many finding it hard to get comfy, the wind speed too high, the light too intense, so the decision was made. After 200yds we stopped for more food. This was a brilliant tactical decision: tea, bacon, sausages, eggs, black pudding, beans, toast; the really brave went for the full breakfast option. So again we set off looking for an early advantage and this was soon to come, not long after rounding the heugh (huff) the first one fell; it gave me a real inner glow as it was someone so near to myself. The next fell near the location of one of the east coast’s many pier chimney combos; the late night camp fires then a long solo drive had worked well. We had to move further offshore and find a nice rolly swell to increase the soporific effect. One by one they all fell, the web mistress and group captain being very difficult but if you look closely, photo evidence can be found. One competitor had fallen early in the orthodox way i.e. on a bunk, but rising to gain max team points he managed an incredible feat of a perfect score through a full 25 mins atop a winch. As yet we think this position is unbeatable.
OK it is never as easy as you think and we had pushed the rules to the limit, one of the crew was a ringer – not only was his membership questionable but had he fallen during the trip? We were not sure, so as a test he was placed before the helm, his fingers placed around the wheel rim, then we all backed off to see the results. There could be no doubt. By his actions it was obvious he was asleep, the whole vessel a ghost ship quietly weaving its way into Blyth, dredger ahead pushed by a tug boat astern, tied up by the locals until we gently awoke at beer o’clock, just in time to go to the pub.

(All positions of collapse and duration verified by HM Inspector of Taxes)

By Tim