Great Rivers of the East
Only a short distance into our pilgrimage and already we are passing areas thick with prayer flags fluttering on a light breeze, yesterdays preparations had gone well with Guru Cornish and Guru Durham passing many donations over the Smalleys’ altar. We had walked the long path to a lesser temple more suited to the novices. Returning to our craft we were happy to see the masters back with many tales to tell even at such a late hour. After we had taken to our sleeping mats, Guru Durham enthralled us with his special chants which can only be done after causing self harm to his very own toes with parts of our own craft’s furniture; with such preparations our journey could not fail.
Our aim was the great holy river of the east: much talked about but only travelled by the few. After passing the first of the flags we came upon an area of great challenge to the quest; many forces were firing upon us but their wrath was absorbed by a magical red-sailed yacht which could sail through the exploding and hissing of many arms with no damage, shielding us from the evil upon the cliffs. As we approached the mystical river the prayer flags became denser. These should be treated with respect as many of those laying out these flags are so frail they are granted payments from the government to help with their incapacity and lack of work. Yet still they come out in all weathers, tending to the flags and the mystical netted dream catching pots they attach under the seas.
At last we were on the holy Tyne, an area joyous with much partying in praise of the gods. It is an area of such warmth and kindness that young ladies feel safe enough to leave their homes at night with barely any need for clothing, and men can be seen shedding all comfort wearing only a t-shirt regardless of painful climatic conditions. As our craft mainly contained novices we were stopped from directly entering the great city but allowed to rest at St. Peter’s; the final approach was only allowed on foot at an hour so early some of the pilgrims from the night before were still on view. Their experiences had been so intense they found it hard to walk or speak and even their complexion had been changed – if only one of us could reach such a state of enlightenment!
Returning to our berth with the blessed bread of Tesco Extra, some onboard spoke of a great ringing but were unable to trace its source. We broke our fast and set off to retrace our course into the mists. After a short while it gave many of us novices much joy to discover Brother Pudsey had been entered by the spirits in such a way as to alter his ability to speak, his movement was much impaired and he had attained the ghostly complexion of the pure at heart.
Much love to Sisters Thornton and Shipley, Brothers Eldwick and Pudsey and, of course, Gurus Durham and Cornish.
Yours, Brother Gildersome
Our aim was the great holy river of the east: much talked about but only travelled by the few. After passing the first of the flags we came upon an area of great challenge to the quest; many forces were firing upon us but their wrath was absorbed by a magical red-sailed yacht which could sail through the exploding and hissing of many arms with no damage, shielding us from the evil upon the cliffs. As we approached the mystical river the prayer flags became denser. These should be treated with respect as many of those laying out these flags are so frail they are granted payments from the government to help with their incapacity and lack of work. Yet still they come out in all weathers, tending to the flags and the mystical netted dream catching pots they attach under the seas.
At last we were on the holy Tyne, an area joyous with much partying in praise of the gods. It is an area of such warmth and kindness that young ladies feel safe enough to leave their homes at night with barely any need for clothing, and men can be seen shedding all comfort wearing only a t-shirt regardless of painful climatic conditions. As our craft mainly contained novices we were stopped from directly entering the great city but allowed to rest at St. Peter’s; the final approach was only allowed on foot at an hour so early some of the pilgrims from the night before were still on view. Their experiences had been so intense they found it hard to walk or speak and even their complexion had been changed – if only one of us could reach such a state of enlightenment!
Returning to our berth with the blessed bread of Tesco Extra, some onboard spoke of a great ringing but were unable to trace its source. We broke our fast and set off to retrace our course into the mists. After a short while it gave many of us novices much joy to discover Brother Pudsey had been entered by the spirits in such a way as to alter his ability to speak, his movement was much impaired and he had attained the ghostly complexion of the pure at heart.
Much love to Sisters Thornton and Shipley, Brothers Eldwick and Pudsey and, of course, Gurus Durham and Cornish.
Yours, Brother Gildersome
posted by Aisha at 9:11 PM
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